Building Confidence

LONG post alert! But I like to wear my heart on my sleeve!

So most people don’t know this about me, and you would probably never guess, you know, since there are like pictures of me in a bathing suit all over my timeline! But I grew up with ZERO confidence. I remember in 7^th grade, neither one of my two friends had lunch during the same time as I did. So I walked through the cafeteria looking for a friendly familiar face on the first day of school, and I couldn’t find a place to sit, so I ate my lunch in the bathroom in a stall. And that is where I ate every day that year. Meeting new friends was a skill I had not grasped yet. I remember actually making up friends to tell my Mom about. Because at the very least I wanted my Mom to think I was cool. My life gradually got easier in that department because I really wanted to be social. So I often forced myself out of my comfort zone. I remember my senior year being in the Miss Mandarin Pageant, when I had zero talent, stage presence, or confidence, because I thought maybe that would make me braver! And guess what, it did! Once you dance on stage with your tap shoes to a show tune in front of your entire highschool… simple things like talking to a new person, doesn’t seem so darn scary anymore! Thank goodness for my sorority in college, because that gave me instant friends and a family away from my family.

When I became a Mom though, I found myself isolated again. Meeting new people became hard. I had to literally force myself out of my comfort zone on the daily to keep from turning into a hermit! I have been reading personal development books now for over a year and really working on me and my confidence, and let me tell you, it’s worked WONDERS! Also, being a part of a team again with my fellow coaches, was my sorority. My friends. My other family.  I am actually at the point now where I don’t compare myself, I don’t care if people think I am a nerd, I embrace it! And get this, I actually talked to two of my coaches yesterday about building their confidence. WHAT THE what? For me to give advice on this topic would have seemed absurd just a year or so ago. And no, although I would like to say it has something to do with losing weight and getting healthy, it really has more to do with work I am doing on the inside! Lacking confidence effects your entire life, not just being nervous to be in a swim suit. It affected me as a wife AND a Mom. If you suffer from this like I did, I really encourage you to step out of your comfort zone, and never stop learning and growing and READING and TRYING! It’s changed my life!